My little piece of the earth will be my final legacy

Well, I've finally done it. I've gone and bought my final resting spot – my cemetery plot.

Before I've ever bought and owned a house, I've purchased my little spot where my body will lie for eternity.

Making the purchase was, frankly, as easy and comfortable as one would hope. The cemetery, Machpelah, in historic Lexington, Missouri, is quite beautiful and holds plenty of history itself.

I met the association's director up near my parents and sister's graves on a beautiful, sunny fall afternoon. The cemetery sits on a small hill, so there is always a breeze up there and plenty of beautiful tall trees.

It's a favorite spot for walkers and genealogists alike. Among those buried in Machpelah include the founder of the Pony Express, the Mormon victims of the Saluda steamboat explosion in 1852, the founder of Wentworth Military Academy, a number of Confederate soldiers (a great battle was fought in Lexington in September of 1861), the first white settler in Lexington, and many, many historic names from Lexington's past.

After parking my car, I approached the man I was to meet. He was standing at my parent's graves holding the cemetery's plot list – still on fragile, much-taped paper, names hand-written and difficult to read.

There was nowhere for me at the inn, so to speak. That's what I get for waiting too long. However, I ended up choosing a spot from where one could stand and see my parents and sister's graves and read their names – essential for some genealogist a hundred years from now who just might be a great-great-great descendant of mine. Yes indeed, I chose my spot with a future genealogist in mind and the view ... not that I'll get to enjoy it after I'm gone.

Purchasing a cemetery plot was not on my list of to-do's when I got up this morning – well OK – actually it was. It's been on that list for about seven years, sitting on a post-it note on my old iMac – now not even working anymore. But like most people, I've put it off. Who wants to spend the money on a plot? Besides the money being spent, it's a pretty strong reminder that I am going to die someday.

My mother in-law recently told me that "we live to die," as she, suffering from Parkinson's Disease, had to go purchase her own plot.

Well, like my parents and sister before me, I'm nothing if not well-prepared. They all bought their plots ahead of time and my sister – ever efficient and knowing she had little time left – chose her headstone and had part of it engraved about five years ago.

I won't go quite that far, but I have to say I'm glad it's done and over with.

When 2013 dawned on January 1st of this year the last thing I thought I'd be doing on October 1 is buying my cemetery plot. No, I'm not anticipating dying anytime soon.

But the year has going in many different directions. My sister took a turn for the worse and passed away, leaving me with her estate to handle – one she, of course – had prepared well ahead of time.

I had to quit my job, more due to an abusive boss than any other reason, but I simply couldn't continue that stress with that of grieving the loss of my sister, moving, dealing with an estate and all the things that go with losing a major member of your family.

My son had a car accident this year and so did I. His injuries were less than mine, but they were both traumatic all the same.

My sister's care with hospice was an epic of nightmarish proportions and it has taken me the better part of these past seven months to recover from them. I don't think I'll ever lose the visual of her writhing on her bed for days on end all because the head nurse didn't think she needed a catheter, only to find out her bladder had been full for four days.

Life goes on, however.

Next step was for us to get our affairs in order while the process was fresh in my mind. It's done and I can rest assured that even my beloved felines will be taken care of, should I pass before they do.

We have begun the process of helping my mother in-law get her affairs in order as well, not such a fun process to do from so far away, but a learning experience nonetheless.

Through it all, we've met some marvelous, helpful people, some of whom will remain in our lives a long time.

My estate attorney and I discovered we both have a love of local history and eagerly share this book or that book, this research or that. If you think a bunch of Nascar enthusiasts can wear you out, try hanging out with a bunch of historians.

As I made my purchase today, I looked around me, spying a few people taking walks through the tree-lined, slightly hilly paths around the cemetery – it's a citywide favorite for walkers. I love walking there. Someday there will be walkers striding past my grave, viewing my dates – the beginning and the end – and perhaps wondering about my life here.

Will they enjoy the view from there? Will they pause a moment to think about me? Sometimes I do that about people I didn't even know.

In the blink of an eye life can be over. I certainly have learned that the hard way with the loss of a nephew 31 years ago after being hit by a car. I myself saw how quickly my own car accident occurred this year with no opportunity to prevent it.  An old friend experienced the same thing yesterday when a vehicle came around a curve while straddling the line, hitting her head on. She had no time to react and is, thankfully, still with us.

Time is precious and life is way too short.

How we live our lives is important. How good are we to each other? Showing courtesy to strangers, love to family and friends and support to those who stumble on the path of life. How do we minister to one another?

How do we spend that time between the dates on our gravestones is our legacy to ourselves, our descendants and each other.

And now, on lovely sunny days, I can walk through Machpelah, enjoy the breeze, the solitude, the peacefulness, stopping at my own spot for a moment and enjoy the view from my own little piece of the earth.